Corporate Rules

Rule-1

The Boss is always right.



Rule-2

If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.



Rule-3

Those who work get more work.

Others get pay, perks, and promotions.


Rule-4

Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down".

The more intelligent a person,

The more hardworking a person,

The more committed a person;

The more number of persons are engaged

in pulling that person down.





Rule-5

If you are good, you will get all the work.

If you are really good, you will get out of it.




Rule-6

When the Bosses talk about improving productivity,

They are never talking about themselves.




Rule-7

It doesn't matter what you do,

It only matters what you say you've done

and what you are going to do.




Rule-8

A pat on the back is only a few centimeters

from a kick in the butt.





Rule-9

Don't be irreplaceable.

If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.




Rule-10

The more crap you put up with,

The more crap you are going to get.



Rule-11

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit.

No use being a damn fool about it.





Rule-12

When you don't know what to do,

Walk fast and look worried.






Rule-13

Following the rules will not get the job done.




Rule-14

If it weren't for the last minute,

Nothing would get done.




Rule-15

Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous".




Rule-16

No matter how much you do,

You never do enough.





Rule-17

You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work

you are supposed to be doing.





Rule-18

In order to get a promotion,

You need not necessarily know your job.





Rule-19

In order to get a promotion,

You only need to pretend that you know your job.






Rule-20

The last person that quit or was fired will be

held responsible for everything that goes wrong