little Johnny

Passing an office building late one night, Little Jhonny saw a sign that said, "Press bell for night watchman."

He did so, and after several minutes he heard the watchman clomping down the stairs.

The uniformed man proceeded to unlock first one gate, then another, shut down the alarm system, and finally made his way through the revolving door.

"Well," he snarled at Lil' Jhonny.
"What do you want?"

"I just want to know why you can't ring the bell for yourself?"
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Protecting cigarettes in rain.

Lil' Jhonny and his friend are sitting on a bench waiting for a bus.

His friend takes out a cigarette and starts to smoke. A minute later it begins to rain, so he takes out a condom, cuts off the end, and carefully places it over the cigarette to shield it from the rain.

Lil' Jhonny looks at that and says,
"That's such a good idea, but what is that plastic thing?"

"It's a condom," The friend replies.

"Well, where can you buy those?" Lil' Jhonny asks.

"Um... Most people buy them at pharmacies." the friend replies.

So Lil' Jhonny goes to a pharmacy and walks up to the counter.

"Do you guys sell those condom things?" she asks the pharmacist.

"Why yes we do," the pharmacist says a little confused.
"Do you know what size you need?"

So Lil' Jhonny says,
"Well it's got to fit a Camel."